Method Man The ashtray is full but Method Man lights up another cigarette. An old lady coughs as he throws his head back and blows smoke straight up above all of them. There are 4 of them in all, sat in a circle around a narrow brown coffee table. So Method Man, how is it going today? How are they taking it? says Mr. Tebbitt, laughing to himself at the joke he made. Method Man does not laugh at the joke or even necessarily recognise it as a joke at all. He says Well Jeff, I told them and they went silent, gasped and a few of them cried. Then they started talking amongst themselves about a suitable tribute and some kind of gift. Mr. Tebbitt likes this and claps his hands together once in an exaggerated way. Method Man likes Mr. Tebbitt as a colleague and enjoys the brief moments they share together professionally. They have never seen each other away from work. Not even by accident. For Method Man, Mr. Tebbitt does not exist before 8AM and after 4PM, and Mr. Tebbitt feels similarly about Method Man. Method Man drinks coffee and smokes cigarettes. He does not have another class for a half hour. He is happy right now. He will be happy when he takes his last class of the day. He will be happy taking his last class ever. He is happy right now. He gets up and walks to the door of the teachers' lounge and looks out of the small window on to the hall. Method Man starts laughing to himself. Mr. Tebbitt comes across the room and everyone else is looking in the direction of Method Man. Mr. Tebbitt hands over a greetings card. Method Man opens it and sees that it is signed by all his colleagues. Everyone. Good luck, it says, We'll miss you a lot. Method Man is laughing at himself. He is laughing at the past 45 years he has spent in this school. Method Man is laughing the truest laugh ever. <<<<<<<<<<          >>>>>>>>>>